Change it up!

Change can be scary, but you know what’s scarier? Allowing fear to stop you from growing, evolving, and progressing. – Mandy Hale

People, I will begin this post by saying if there is something on your mind and you are afraid to do it but it will bring you a new start, let me tell you just do it. Life is scary and it will never make you feel less scared. I am going to say that nobody has the power to change the life you are living except you. First, you need to accept that life is scary and hard and make yourself strong to live it. There are many moments in our life, where we are afraid to take a step because change is scary but anyway life is scary and what is going to happen will happen nothing can change that. But you have to make that change in your favour, you need to change it up. Give it a try it might not work out but that does not mean you are a failure. Remember the strongest mind is created because of failure and the lessons it taught us. Sometimes change is what we need to find the path in our lives and it will not be easy but living a life is all about taking risks and working on them. Change is unpredictable and is all tied up with fate, however, what if I tell you to do it, do what you love, take up the courage and choose the path that you know will somewhere in the future make you happy, and is there another reason I need to give so just change it up!

“You can, you should, and if you’re brave enough to start, you will.” – Stephen King.

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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Tears won’t fall…

Some cry with tears, others with thoughts…

Lately, my feelings have been all over the place and because of that, I am feeling a lot of different emotions that are very eccentric. The post feelings nowadays describe why this post comes into the picture. You know when at a certain point in your life you come to realize how different your life has become in just a certain span of time. The growth and the development of career and education are a whole lot of different things. However the inner emotions, the feelings, the difficulties all of these make you feel that you are the most stupid person in the whole world. And what is that sucks you know when the emotions are dead there is nothing you feel, you are just going with the flow. It is said that when the feelings are overwhelmed in the heart then you bleed with the eyes, and the tears prove that you feel hurt. However, one thing I realized late is that the heart also bleeds and it shooks up the soul in an unimagined way. But now everything is changed when we say a cold-hearted person does not feel anything you know why because the emotions are dead. There is a wall between the heart and the feelings that is not letting the heart feel anything the tears won’t fall.

It hurts but at the same time, you feel nothing, it’s like a body without a soul. Does everyone go through this phase in their life or is it just me? Your heart bleeds too when it gets overwhelmed by the emotions and your tears are not falling from your eyes. You know now everything will change how you feel, how you used to be, and how you will be. It gives the situation that even though you are surrounded by people on a buzzing street but still from afar you look like an alone person covered in a black hoodie that hides all their pain and emotions. Now all the feelings that were left for others are over, you only need to focus on yourself and your mental health and maybe that is why tears won’t fall…

The most painful tears are not the ones that fall from your eyes and cover your face. They’re the ones that fall from your heart and cover your soul.

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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Feelings Nowadays…

And then suddenly I cared even less.

I was thinking is it good right that we stopped caring, we don’t feel anything, we are in a neutral mood, and we do not fear anything, what happens happens? But at the same time, another thought went through me: why is it bad to be caring, why is it bad to feel anything? Why did we stop caring because we went through something right? Because our voices are never listened to, before we stopped caring, something happened, something we went through that made us feel like this. We are humans and are bound to have feelings; there is nothing wrong with that. It is just up to us how to make ourselves strong and keep our feelings in check but that does not mean we are emotionless. I think the world has misunderstood the concept of keeping our feelings in check and on the other hand thinking it is good to have I don’t care aura. If a person is good at taking feelings that does not mean it will not hurt him/her.

And when things start to get better, you finally start to sort out your feelings that sudden realisation, that what if all those things happened again when you start caring and you see yourself at the same spot what if you are back at the square? And after a while, it feels good when you stop caring because nothing matters right? With less intervention, people just leave you alone and you are emotionless. But what about the inside war you are battling to be honest you also know that you have to do it alone anyway but it hurts more when it actually starts to feel like alone amidst people. And then they ask you why you changed, and what happened as if they are not the reason behind all of this.

And you know what sucks more that nothing can bring you enjoyment like after eating your favourite food, reading your favourite book, or watching your comfort show nothing brings you excitement it’s like you just feel nothing like you used to and now nothing can bring you happiness.

This blog post is very raw. I wrote this in pieces whenever I felt like my feelings needed to be poured out and now when I read this I can see that it’s better to stop caring…

And then one day with no explanation, she just didn’t care anymore.

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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Anniversary Post – Three Years of Blogging!

Happy Blog-i-versary to me!!!

Let us live like flowers

wild and beautiful

and drenched in sun

14th July 2024

When people say time flies by when you are having fun, it is so true but I also believe those times have speed breakers in between to slow down and truly make you feel those moments. And I also think those speed breakers are to slow down the vehicle and fasten the belt for ahead rocky roads. The above sentences are what three years of blogging looked like for me. I saw myself grow so much, I saw myself become so proactive, I saw myself become a better person, I saw myself become proud of myself, and I saw changes in myself that I wouldn’t have if I hadn’t started blogging. You know how sometimes you are asked to do something and are afraid because you might not know how but you just do it and wonder how. This is what blogging did to me. I became so confident, actually talk confidently, put my points out there, and think differently which I would never be able to do without blogging.

Having a place where I can pour out my feelings is a big privilege that I will forever be grateful for. I don’t know what the future holds for me and how many anniversary blog posts I am going to write. I don’t know what next year will bring but till now what blogging has done for me and the lessons it taught I will never forget and will forever be thinking about it.

Thank you to all of you. Without you all I wouldn’t be here. I am not good at expressing my feelings but I will try to open up more. I hope my blogging post brings some relief and happiness to you, I hope that this a girl who likes to write becomes a place where you can just lend on and read a post and find yourself within it. Remember this girl right here appreciates all of your efforts and will forever be grateful for your existence. Thank you so much.

Following are my past anniversary posts just in case you want to check it out. Click here.

I also read my first blog post to see how far I have come.

Life has no script. Live it.

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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The Beginning…

A new beginning is not a date or a place but a mindset. It’s the moment you tell yourself, “I can do better.”

Why always look at how things ended, how we all want a happy ending, how we all want everything to be worth it in the end because that’s what matters right? Maybe yes, but we also know that a happy ending is just a facade, mostly it’s how we never wanted. But here I am writing this to assure you that it’s okay and why are we so obsessed with the ending because of that we miss something beautiful and mesmerizing which is the beginning. The ending might not be something we wanted but at least we can look at the beginning from where we started and how happy those moments were. Life is all about ups and downs from happiness to sadness the life cycle will continue but it also gives us the happy moments to look and feel in our sadness. Because of the ending, we miss the beauty of the beginning, which might be a ray of sunshine on our cloudy and dark days, we never know so gather all the happiness and keep it for the days when you question your life. We are so distracted with how things end, that we forget how beautiful the beginning was. It might not have worked with several efforts, but sometimes we are meant to do something extraordinary, that is calling our name for that one chapter has to close and another has to open. But that does not imply our memories will fade away, the time spent was all worth it. And lastly, if someone asks if you could go back and do it all again while knowing the ending, proudly answer them, yes because the ending does not matter what matters is the lifetime memories that come with The Beginning.

Some things have to end for better things to begin

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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Why are unfinished stories more beautiful?!

Love is like war…easy to start, difficult to finish and impossible to forget.

As I have already said, I am not a huge romantic type of a person so feelings naturally do not come to me. However, some days ago I watched a 17-minute short film where the love story remains unfinished and let me tell you I bawled my eyes out and then decided to write this post. It’s a controversial opinion but for me, the ending does not matter if the plot serves its purpose perfectly. The short film included two people who love each other yet can’t be with each other and never confess and trust me that kind of love definitely hurts the most. Love has many parts; one part makes us feel like we are on cloud nine. However, the biggest part about loving is being each other’s strength and facing challenges together. If I read a book or watch a drama I love to see the bonding and how the couple love each other despite the ending. Nobody can change the ending but that does not mean the story can’t be beautiful. Unfinished stories hurt the most, but those stories are like masterpieces about what a love went through to not have a happy ending. I think it’s common that we hear about ancient stories where it is always talked about how two souls have done so much for each other but fate plays its dice and not let the two soul mates be with each other. These are the stories that are more heard and more loved. Because it has such a beautiful depth that brings tears in the eyes and goosebumps on the body. And it is said truly that true love stories never have ended it is loved by everyone and heard by everyone. Unfinished stories set an example of how difficult love is and it is not about the physical but the soul that resides in it. I know it hurts to just think that two people who love each other are not destined to be with each other, nothing can bend fate but that does not mean that unfinished love is not beautiful. Trust me unfinished stories are so mesmerising that you just want to wrap your hand around them and ask how two people can love each other so much that they are ready to sacrifice. Ending this by writing that unfinished stories are the only thing people can find beautiful and heart-wrenching.

They call it a mystery. I call it love. In both cases, the story remains unsolved and incomplete…

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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I GRADUATED!!!!!!!

So, I close my eyes to old ends and open my heart to new beginnings.

You all I GRADUATED and I can’t believe how fast time has gone. I am a little late with this post but it’s okay I just wanted to share my thoughts and happiness on this and maybe after 10 years I will be back again reliving this moment. On my blog, I have already talked about how my first year started online and I hoped that my last year would be offline in the post Back to the Grind where I began going to university again after the pandemic. My end was definitely offline and I enjoyed it a lot but someday I did feel like just quitting it, I mean it’s common right? As I said earlier I am late for this post however after graduating I went through a lot in deciding what I wanted to do. And had a lot of clashes with family members as their opinions were entirely different than mine and it went on for months. A lot of tears were shed, a lot of discussions, a lot of tense situations and no outcomes were coming out. Obviously, it did come but after months of hard times, we are finally over and here I am I wouldn’t say that this is what I wanted and someday I do think a lot if things had happened the way I planned that would be so much better and life would be so different. But it is okay, I guess I need to move on and I am okay because this outcome is not that bad, just some regrets lingering behind and it will never go away I know that and I have learned to live with it. And now I can feel that tears will drop at any moment.

Graduation feels like a dream, growing up, going to school, college and getting a degree and just like that life changes a lot. In school, it’s just getting good marks but in college, it’s about being a better and a kind person. To be honest for me, college was a safe hole because I did not have to think about the future and maybe I wanted time to stop and let me live in the moment longer but Alas! I made good friends and had a good time getting to know myself a lot better. And I most definitely passed with very good grades and I am so thankful to myself for pushing through and reaching another milestone in my life. And I know now as at this moment there might be a lot on my plate but I am going to be okay as long as I have faith and believe in myself.

To all who graduated or are graduating soon, I am so proud and happy for you and just believe in yourself, the future is going to be okay.

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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Dear My Past Self!

Dear My Past Self,

I forgive you. You were young and you didn’t know any better. But you were never wrong. I’m sorry I was too harsh on you, I’m sorry that I did not believe in you, I’m sorry I always doubted you, and I’m sorry for saying you can’t do any better. You were doing your very best and I know you did lose but it is OK, I can guarantee you, we will be doing okay in the future, don’t worry. Now you’ve grown, you know better, and you’ll do better so rest assured my dear, I forgive you.

— Your Future Self

There is a reason why I keep it all inside because I have “Only Me” to listen to my words.

I never thought how much I owe to my future self. Our past is indeed the reason for where we are now. To succeed in the future we have to go through failure not because we are not capable of succeeding at first but because failure is the key to making us the strongest person in the room. You deserve everything and the past plays an important role in that. For wanting to watch the breathtaking sunrise we need to hike miles through rocky mountain roads but in the end, it is all worth it. But it is you who decides that you want to watch that sunrise so you climb that rocky mountain because you know in the end it will be all worth it. Same with life to achieve success you need to go through rocky phases in the past to be able to get a deserved future. I know the mistakes, disappointments, failures, all negative feelings are not easy to deal with but aren’t those feelings that make you the strongest, that make you the toughest, and that make you fight for your dreams. Don’t try to compare yourself with your old self that was your version where you were learning a lot and mistakes were meant to happen. And your new version will be the version of new growth, new learning, and new mistakes and that is okay. What is important is the “actual you,” don’t lose it because life is diverse, it will change and you will also see a lot of your versions but be true to yourself. Learn to live a life that makes you feel happy like a leaf on a windy day that is flowing but still rooted to its stem.

To heal a wound, you need to stop touching it.

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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Taare Zameen Par (Stars on the Earth)

“If you want to win competitions, then breed racehorses dammit, don’t have kids!”

Taare Zameen Par, the Indian movie released in 2007, has so much in it that I get goosebumps every time I watch it. I was too young when I watched the movie but still, I remember how much it reflects our society. Ishaan is a young boy with dyslexia and his older brother is a genius. And Ishaan’s father has the same expectations from both but only one can fulfill them. He fails to understand not every child is the same even when they have the same blood running. Ishaan’s father always shows anger at him because he can’t be like his older brother or other children. He can’t read or write, but rather than finding out why he is struggling, he accuses him of not doing enough. Ishaan was the boy who needed more love from his parents and equally, the assurance and acceptance he longed for. There is a scene in the movie, where he was roaming and saw a father with his toddler on his shoulder buying him a gola (an ice ball) and he was there just standing alone. The love and care that he deserves and wants from his father never began but only the series of disappointments he felt every single step in his life. Even his teacher could not understand him and he was sent to a hostel which he assumed was a place where parents send their children to punish. Ishaan was a genius in drawing but not in studies, his father labeled him lazy because learning what is written in the textbook is important. But then his teacher, Nikumbh understood and taught him how to write and read. And he was the one who understood him and that should be his parents. But again parents are so engaged in finding their children’s mistakes that they fail to see what mistakes they are committing. Nikumbh understood Ishaan because he also had dyslexia. One good teacher can change everything like Nikumbh did for Ishaan, but it’s hard to find that teacher.

My mother was my guide when we watched this movie. Apart from what I learned she explained to me so much. She told me that not every child is the same and that is okay, every child is special but some have other specialities that this world calls names. Every parent who does not have a special child will never understand how much it takes for the child to grow up being loved not just by his parents but by the world as well. Why should a child expect love from others when their own parents do not care for them. Society is so harsh that until they don’t go through it, they won’t understand. Understanding a child is every parent’s job but not everyone can do it. Blaming the child is not an option; they do not choose to be born like that. Every child is special in their own way but not every parent can see this. If it is easy for the parents to point out their children’s mistakes then the world will do it anyway. Ending this by saying that every child is a star on this earth (The literal meaning of the movie title).

There have been such gems amongst us who changed the course of the world because they could look at the world differently.

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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A Random Midnight Thought…

Acceptance of what can’t change can actually change your whole life.

The most important thing I have learned in my life is that to succeed I need to accept and face my faults rather than make excuses to save myself and give myself false assurance. It is all about us, in the end, we can’t blame anyone else if it’s even their fault nothing is going to change anyway. Nobody will take responsibility for our life, we only have to take it and acceptance is vital. The hardest thing is to accept the inevitable and we know nothing will change it, it has happened but we need to accept it. I know myself and my faults but accepting that will highlight my insecurities I want to run away from. But I know somewhere that I need to accept it, it is a part of me and I am not perfect nor do I want to become one. I just need to see myself through all my flaws and accept all the faults I made but also it made me reach somewhere. If that fault had not happened maybe I would not be here sharing my words with the world. When I started blogging, I did a lot of research but never I doubted how I was going to do it and here I am. It is going to be three years of my blogging journey in 2 months, isn’t it crazy but it is said true when you are having fun, time flies. With blogging many good things came but before I made myself better I had accepted the inevitable of my life that I can’t change.

It takes a lot of courage to accept the fault but it is the way to move ahead. Failure is not a bad thing but a thing that will play a role in shaping your dreams and life because through unright ways we reach unexpected destinations. You are doing great and don’t shy away from your failure keep the courage to accept it maybe it might open doors to things that you always longed for or things that you never knew you needed.  

This comeback is personal, it’s apology to myself.

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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