Tag: blogging

Self-Betrayal

What betrayed me the most?

The soul within others that I trusted or the heart inside me?

It hurts so much when someone close to us betrays us most unexpectedly, however, some days ago I was lost in my thoughts and a sudden realization came to me, will I be able to forgive myself for self-betraying? I am at that point in my life where all the major decisions have been taken and now life is heading towards it. However, if you are following me for a while you might know many unexpected things have happened in my life, which might not be something I wanted. I always think that if I had fought more, my life would have been different. It is great to tell people that you are doing something you love because you feel happy from inside but when you see someone doing the job they love a part of your mind always cornered you for self-betraying. The thoughts always came at the most unexpected time and left me wondering what position I had put myself in. From childhood we are shown to put others’ needs in front of us but what about us? We learned that our needs are not important and we let others make decisions about our lives. The self-betrayal will always be there reminding us how life would be so different and continue to hurt. But I have started to acknowledge those feelings rather than running away, acceptance is the key and for me to heal, it is important. I will say don’t even lie to yourself, give time and if it’s hurting let it hurt until you are okay to see that there is another path waiting for you. Be patient with yourself, take it slow, let it be absorbed and take time to acknowledge the position you are in. Make boundaries around you, sometimes we overshare which is not good because certain thoughts should be kept to us, it’s ours. The scar will always remain but you are stronger to wear it like a crown.

Time has a wonderful way of showing us what really matters.

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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Book Review: Tales from the Cafe (#2) by Toshikazu Kawaguchi

Tales from the Cafe is the second book in the Before the Coffee Gets Cold series and probably my least favourite. The cafe is back with the four stories where we meet a man who has raised his best friend’s daughter and wants to seek his best friend, the son who did not come home for his mother’s funeral, the lover who travelled to see the girl he couldn’t marry, and the ageing detective who couldn’t save his own wife. The stories in this book are all about the regret left behind and the people want the chance to go back in time. On the side street in Tokyo is a cafe Funiculi Funicula that serves good coffee in a warm surrounding. However, the cafe also offers a unique experience to its customers: the chance to travel back in time. However, there are certain rules that the customers have to stick to, otherwise there is severe punishment.

I felt that this book was a little underwhelming for me when I read the blurb I thought it would connect with me well but did not. The stories are all different but each of them includes the regret and pain of their past that they are still carrying. The book is easy to read and short but it took me time to read. The characters are fantastic, it is moving to see the perspective of life through different characters and how each of them is going through something so painful and regretful.

Another thing in this book that captured me was the backstory of the cafe waitress Kazu, as she is shown emotionless and talks straight to the point. The backstory of Kazu and the cafe ghost was not something I was expecting, but it was heartwrenching. Remorse is unbearable if it includes someone we love, and these stories are the perfect example of it.

I would recommend reading it once.

Rating: 3.5/5

Check out the review for the first book here.

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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I am the quiet one.

I am the quiet one

that nobody expects much from.

I like to read, write, and

think alone.

I observe others in their loudness

and my silence.

I prefer keeping my thoughts to myself

and asking questions that nobody has the answer to.

I am the piece of the puzzle

that doesn’t fit.

I always ask myself

Why is it hard to be like them?

Why I don’t like things

that most of them do?

Why is it hard to find

myself in the loudness?

Why is it always me?

I have been bearing

the question in my heart since I got to know the world.

Why do I always notice people and try

to make them comfortable while they walk confidently?

Why is it always me?

Maybe because

I am the quiet one

that nobody notices…

In the last post, I wrote about how in silence I have started to embrace the loudness that comes with it and then I realize how as a person I have become so quiet. So I decided to write this post in a poem format but in a free way. I wanted to try something new and I just went with it. I hope you guys like it.

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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Review: ‘Oh My Venus’ K-drama (2015)

“Everyone is in pain, either a lot or a little, in their own way.” – Kim Young-ho

One of the biggest reasons I started this K-drama is because of how hot and handsome the male lead is, and it’s very rare for me to get attracted to a male lead. This K-drama is about a lawyer Kang Joo-eun, who is in her late thirties and gets jilted by her long-term boyfriend for gaining weight. So she decided to get professional help and met a celebrity trainer, Kim Young-ho. This drama features a fat-to-thin trope, and being set in 2015, it may be perceived as offensive to the audience in this era.

However, I think the 2015 drama portrayed the fat-to-thin trope very well. Because her being overweight has to do with her health rather than her beauty. The biggest reason I like it is that the male lead started liking the female lead before she lost weight, and both fell for each other because of their personality, which I think is a positive point for the show. Talking about Kim Young-ho, played by So Ji-sub and if you are familiar with K-drama actors, you know that he is one of the hottest K-drama actors, and I started because of him. In the beginning, he is very harsh, but later he gets to know her personality and wants her to be healthy, and we can see he starts developing feelings for her.

Talking about Kang Joo-eun, played by Shin Min-a, her character is freaking hilarious, but people around her don’t take her seriously because she is overweight. The chemistry is insane, another reason to watch the drama. I can say both were hot as hell as a couple, and I can feel the tension. Aside from the comedy aspect, the drama taught me a lot. I have watched drama recently, and that is why I can come up with things it taught, like no matter how one looks, we truly never know what is going on with them. And insecurities are always there, no matter how one looks.

Like Kim Young-ho, he has it all; he is wealthy, tall, and muscular. However, that is from the outside; from the inside, he has challenges he has to overcome, and his emotional mess prevents him from living a good life. The female lead’s ex-best friend was also overweight, then she lost weight and got a model figure; however, she still has insecurities about it. We live in a world of beauty standards, and if you fit, then the world will take you seriously, but if you are not fit like Kang Joo-eun, then you are a joke to the world.

The last 60 seconds of the drama ruined everything for me. I don’t know what the writer was thinking and writing that scene. I would say just skip that last part.

This drama has both negative and positive points, but I think it is a classic drama to watch once. The chemistry is insane, so I recommend it.

“If you’re hanging in there, you haven’t reached your limit.” – Kang Joo-eun

My Rating: 7.5/10

Total Episodes: 16

Genre: Romance, Friendship, Comedy

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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Silence in loudness…

there’s so much said in the words we don’t say

There is a silence in me that is so loud that it makes me so familiar with myself and my surroundings. I am someone who can understand others without them saying anything, their silence is so loud that I can hear and with that, I truly never understood when I am also getting used to being in silence. The saying is true silence is so loud if you are a good listener and I think I fit in the category. I was never like that but after I hit adulthood I started being alone not listening to anything just sitting in my thoughts. Yesterday I was travelling around and there was so much loudness but my silence was so strong that I did not know when I arrived. I think I like myself in silence where I can focus on myself and my thoughts. I like being the quiet one who observes the surroundings around me rather than the loud one. I think you can find answers in silence rather than in loudness because silence has so much power to give you answers. I love being myself, I love enjoying being with my thoughts, and I like when I am stuck in my silence and the world keeps moving forward it gives me the power to take my time and then move on. The day I got to know how loud silence is was the day I truly got to see the world and myself. I think being the quiet one helps me be in control of my thoughts and when I see people around me I also think about how many feelings they are going through. I also pray that whoever is going through something may get over it well. Being able to be in silence in the chaos of life just sit and think about life – I love those feelings, silence in loudness.

“The quieter you become, the more you are able to hear.”

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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Book Review: Before the Coffee Gets Cold (#1) by Toshikazu Kawaguchi

I always loved books and movies that let me experience time travel because of the mistakes I have made in the past, which I can’t rectify but seeing fictional characters getting the chance makes me imagine myself in their place and I feel happy. Before the Coffee Gets Cold is the first book in the series and when I heard it’s Japanese coffee-themed and time travel I knew I needed to read this book and I’m glad I picked this up. So basically this book talks about a funiculi funicula cafe in a small back alley in Tokyo that has been serving brewed coffee for more than one hundred years. But with coffee, they allow their customers a unique experience and what is that? The chance to travel back in time. But there is a catch, a risk certain rules that need to be followed for the person to go back in time. And I am not going to tell you because it’s the main thing and experience that you need to find out by reading the book. The book follows four visitors who want to make things right using the cafe’s time-travelling offer.

Now the book is divided into four parts with each part a new customer comes and time travels and their story is told. Each story is so different from the others, however, the common thing between them is the regret and how they want to go back and make things right. But that’s the thing what happened in the past can’t be corrected, the choices were made and destiny played its part. All four stories felt like a warm hug, the characters were beautiful and how I can relate to them. In this book, the stories focus on the lovers, husband and wife, the sisters, and the mother and child and each of them felt to the heart.

This book shows the memories we have of our loved ones and the life we have with them, we can’t imagine living without them but circumstances can’t be reversed. This cafe allows people to get the chance to relive the moment differently but with rules that must be followed. The waitress in the cafe, Kazu Tokita is such a pure and heartwrenching character and I loved her the most. The setting is beautiful as it doesn’t give an impression that in such an ordinary old cafe something big like going back magic can happen but that is what makes it unique.

I loved the book because it’s pure and very calming to read. The author did an incredible job with his writing to showcase the peaceful vibe of the book. I highly recommend this book.

Rating: 4/5

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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Vulnerability

Vulnerability is terrifying, the courage it takes to reveal your heart is one of the most daunting…and yet rewarding experiences in life, it will set you free.

I think the concept of being strong in life seems to be a little misunderstood. I feel like this world has made people ashamed if they show their vulnerability and nothing is wrong with this. We are humans, not robots, we are bound to have feelings and every feeling is valid just like being vulnerable. In every person’s life, there are moments of vulnerability where they reflect on their life. Some days we just want to sit and be vulnerable rather than strong and just save up the energy of being strong. Our mind needs a rest and it’s okay to have days where your mind is empty and you feel like doing nothing. Our whole life we are busy doing things to keep up with the world but that doesn’t mean we don’t deserve a break. When we are in the stage of vulnerability we actually see who we are, we see our true self without the mask and allowing people to see us which is one of the greatest and fearest things in life. Talking up the courage to open up is one of the strongest things to do. Strength lies in vulnerability. It takes courage to open up about fears, dreams and hopes that we have kept locked inside the heart but connect on a deeper level. Sometimes it is mandatory to show people that we are humans and being vulnerable is not weak but it makes you stronger on a more profound level. There is nothing like being vulnerable means weak, it’s just a time to rest and reflect on how you truly are. There is a fear of how others will view you with your vulnerable side, however, remember being vulnerable means being true to yourself. But vulnerability is frightening too because not everyone can open up about being vulnerable however it will set you free, and it’s a rewarding experience of your life to see who you truly are and what you truly deserve.

Embracing vulnerability unlocks true strength.

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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Review: ‘Falling into Your Smile’ C-drama (2021)

“Necklace this year, Diamond ring next year with a marriage certificate. You look great with anything.” – Lu Si Cheng to Tong Yao

Another one of my favourite Chinese dramas that I will never stop yapping about. I love sports in general and drama, especially Chinese are highly invested in turning them into dramas. I love video games I mean I have spent my entire childhood playing video games, so when I came across this drama I knew I had to watch it. It is about Tong Yao, the first female player in the all-male ZGDX team. She is bubbly, however, her team leader, Lu Si Cheng is cold-hearted. They start on the wrong foot but seeing them setting everything right is worth a thousand times.

Let’s start with the plot of the drama, it involves games and the relationship between the teammates. The biggest concern of mine while watching sports drama is that sometimes they focus so much on sports that relationship development is cornered. But I think this drama balances sports and romance very well. Their teammates were hilarious and I liked that in playing games they were equally treated so nobody looked extra. I liked that they did not focus so much on the female lead’s past but they let it flow. Another thing I liked was the importance of playing as a team and how different it is from playing as an individual. The warm-up of teammates and the slow learning of each other were heartwarming to see. I also loved the fact that the drama revolves around the video games only, not another unnecessary act they added.

Lu Si Cheng, the cold-hearted captain of the team and his face card never declines. I love leads who speak less and act more and he definitely falls in this category. I loved the way he played games and truly acted as the leader. He was the first one who understood Tong Yao and made her realize the importance of playing as a team. I love male leads who are very much clear on what they want and he is the one. He realizes his feelings and confesses them directly to Tong Yao, Oh I love that scene.

Now, Tong Yao is one of my favourite female characters. I loved that the drama portrayed female and male leads as equal in the game. She is hilarious and her scenes are so funny. I want to point out that she is the only girl living in the house with boys. And we might think she will be uncomfortable however she is straightforward while the boys feel shy. I love how she is so game-focused and truly knows her path.

The chemistry is electrifying, I think that added another charm to the drama. I loved their confession scene – simple and sweet. The way Lu Si Cheng confesses in a slow and non-hesitant manner shows he truly wants to be with her. Their pets: the cat and fish play cupid for the couple and I adored it. Also, after getting into a relationship I liked how they kept their professional and personal affairs different from each other. There is no misunderstanding or breakup, a positive point to watch.

The friendship between them is so pure and real. I liked how slowly they warmed up to Tong Yao plus all of them were hilarious. The cinematography was breathtaking, and the stage for the game was beautiful and intense. The house of the ZGDX was so mesmerizing and energetic. I want that house.

Overall the drama ticks all the good marks for friendship, games, and romance so I recommend it.

“Do you want to give it a try?” – Lu Si Cheng

“Try what?” – Tong Yao

“Me.” – Lu Si Cheng

My Rating: 9/10

Total Episodes: 31

Genre: Romance, Friendship, E-sport, Youth

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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Having Hobbies…

A good hobby can dispel heartache and give zest to life.

When you become an adult you realize the importance of small things like having hobbies. At first, I used to think that being good at something is what you call a hobby and obviously, only a few people can have that, not me. I was not good at anything and never had any hobbies to be honest and never really realized the importance of it. But I was made to feel bad because I could not do something or be good at “as a child,” diabolical. Anyways look at the contrast when you are a child you need to be perfect at whatever you are doing like drawing but in adulthood you do things just to make yourself happy without caring about the perfection of it. Things that can make your heart at ease, things that make your inner soul happy, and things that bring your inner child out are what are called hobbies. Hobbies are meant to bring out your creativity, making you happy without caring about the result. I think hobbies are the only way humans do not care about the result. Having hobbies means enjoying, resting your mind, satisfying your inner soul, filling yourself with laughter, and making endless memories. Just like the smell of perfume brings you back in time, having hobbies brings back your happiness, laughter, and carefree time. As an adult things that bring some enjoyment in the hectic life are what we truly deserve and hobbies are for that. I think being able to just enjoy without the tension of how it will come out is really a matter that is slept upon. I look at hobbies as a recharge to get back to my hectic schedule otherwise I lose my mind just by doing the same thing. And being creative does not mean being exceptionally good at things but it means living a life but in a fun manner.

Do more things that bring you real and honest joy.

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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Book Review: Intermezzo by Sally Rooney

I hate myself because how could I not read from Sally Rooney until now? I have heard a lot of people say how intricate and different her books are and I decided to read her latest release Intermezzo. Let me tell you I was not at all disappointed by her, I admire this book so much. I just finished the book and wrote the review because I can’t hold back talking about how much I learned. So this book follows two brothers, a 32-year-old Peter and a 22-year-old Ivan, who had just lost their father. Peter is a lawyer, torn between two women he loves equally. Ivan, a chess prodigy, sees himself fall for a woman who is 14 years older than him. The book shows their life and how they are coping after their father’s death and also, the women in their life. It is said from three perspectives Peter, Ivan and Margaret.

First of all, let’s talk about the different things in the book. The highly controversial thing people hated was the absence of quotation marks in the dialogue. To be honest I did not know about this however I got used to it quickly. At first, it might be really hard but when I got used to it I loved the book. Sally very intelligently uses different writing techniques between Peter and Ivan’s chapters. In Peter’s chapters, the writing style is incomplete, choppy, and hard to understand while Ivan’s is straightforward, direct, and easy to understand. The book focuses on the grief of two brothers who do not share a great bond and after their father passed away how hard it was for them to connect.

Peter, his character might be my favourite and very hard to understand. He according to his brother is very social, good-looking, decisive, and a perfect person to live life. But in reality, from my perspective, Peter was a man who struggled a lot and never had anyone to share his feelings with because he was the oldest. Initially, it was hard for me to connect with Peter but as he opened up about his feelings, I sympathised with him. It is truly said that grief is that feeling that will never go away and a person who is grieving will fall in the big hole of regret and guilt. It was the same with Peter, first of all, he can’t seem to move on and let go of the situation that he is in. He is torn between two women and can’t let go of either of them because people in his life have made him confused.

Ivan is someone who lost his father at the age of 22 which is very early and he is the one who was closest to his father. Ivan is someone whose character is shown as rebellious and has a strong opinion about life. It is easy to understand Ivan because of his strong views and straightforwardness. The thing I would salute Sally for is that she has shown Ivan as a character who is young and prone to mistakes. His frustrations, fears, doubts, awkwardness and regrets felt so personal. I definitely connected with Ivan first because he thinks very intensely which is actually kind of scary. After all, being 22 and thinking so deeply about life is scariest.

The relationship between Peter and Ivan as brothers brings tears to my eyes. Ivan already created his thinking about Peter but in reality, he never asked Peter how he was doing in life. While Peter does not think before sharing his opinion on Ivan’s decision. I loved the confrontation scene that screamed that they were real brothers. I loved it when Ivan realised his mistakes and understood why Peter changed and apologised. Their relationship and this book taught me how awkward I am feeling, and how much I dislike someone but if I see someone I will always ask how they are doing.

I love books which show flawed characters because they’re highly relatable. It is a slow-paced book so if you want to read it you need to have an open mind and be ready to meet the flawed characters. I recommend this book at least once because it’s legit literary fiction that made me feel so many emotions and I loved every emotion I went through when I read.

Rating: 4.5/5

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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