Raw feelings…

Being a person who feels things deeply is exhausting.

I was sitting in the middle of the chaos, but my heart was so empty that the outside chaos couldn’t stir the chaos in my heart. These are my thoughts when I was sitting between kids running around and just living their lives. And this brought me back to my time as a child. I was a child who lived fully. I played my heart out and never worried about my future or what I would be once I grew up. Now, when I look at myself, I have grown a lot in a lot of ways. I was a child who never believed that I could stand up on the stage and speak a few things, that I could overcome any challenges, or that I could ever achieve things. But as for where I am today, I can proudly say I am doing everything that I was made to believe that I couldn’t do. I feel like, as I have gotten older, I have gotten really quiet, but I have a raging storm in me that I don’t know how to express. But at certain times, I feel like nothing, no matter what is happening around me, I feel empty inside. I don’t know how to express myself, especially my feelings, which are so intense that I feel nothing, leaving me feeling empty from the inside. This makes me believe that every feeling is valid, and it’s okay to feel nothing when everything becomes intense. Everyone has different ways in which they deal with their feelings. For me, it’s to give it time and let it flow; otherwise, I can’t function properly. Also, I need to think about my feelings, I need to observe my surroundings and express how it makes me feel, and one of the reasons why I am here is to express my raw feelings.

I wrote this post in the situation, so it came really raw. I hope whoever is reading this post is okay, and that it’s okay to deal with feelings that make you feel nothing inside. Everything will work out eventually.

It’s okay. To feel all the feels.

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.

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The chaos of life…

“Life is divine Chaos. It’s messy, and it’s supposed to be that way.” – Keats

I love calmness, but I also adore the chaos of life. When you are walking on the street surrounded by thousands of people and wonder what kind of life they are living and what kind of life you are living, but at the same time, you are in the same place. Life is something; if we look upon it as a queen of mischief, it will throw you down, but like a magic flying carpet, it will catch you. I believe in the chaos of life. I like trying things that seem so out of this world, things that bring drama to my life, because we only live once, and no one knows what will happen next, so why not do dramatic things? I believe that embracing the chaos of life gives you a whole new perspective on it, you find beauty in things that you never even thought about, and you get to know the beauty and the chaos it carries, bringing you the ultimate comfort. All great things are embedded with chaos; chaos is constant in life, but we must find peace within it. Messy things can be beautiful, like abstract painting that might not make sense to a common person, but it looks phenomenal. Maybe the chaos of life will make you go mad, but it’s okay, everyone is a bit mad, so instead burn it, let go and just dive into the chaos life has brought. Maybe this will help you find where you truly belong. Embracing life makes everything so easy, and we actually get to see the beauty of it, but it also comes with a lot of chaos that we need to hug in order to go past it and find the beauty and peace in it. I have heard that to survive, you need to be wild in chasing your dreams, and that will happen when you know how to embrace the chaos of life…

And she embraced the chaos as it painted her life with purpose.

Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write

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