And then suddenly I cared even less.
I was thinking is it good right that we stopped caring, we don’t feel anything, we are in a neutral mood, and we do not fear anything, what happens happens? But at the same time, another thought went through me: why is it bad to be caring, why is it bad to feel anything? Why did we stop caring because we went through something right? Because our voices are never listened to, before we stopped caring, something happened, something we went through that made us feel like this. We are humans and are bound to have feelings; there is nothing wrong with that. It is just up to us how to make ourselves strong and keep our feelings in check but that does not mean we are emotionless. I think the world has misunderstood the concept of keeping our feelings in check and on the other hand thinking it is good to have I don’t care aura. If a person is good at taking feelings that does not mean it will not hurt him/her.
And when things start to get better, you finally start to sort out your feelings that sudden realisation, that what if all those things happened again when you start caring and you see yourself at the same spot what if you are back at the square? And after a while, it feels good when you stop caring because nothing matters right? With less intervention, people just leave you alone and you are emotionless. But what about the inside war you are battling to be honest you also know that you have to do it alone anyway but it hurts more when it actually starts to feel like alone amidst people. And then they ask you why you changed, and what happened as if they are not the reason behind all of this.
And you know what sucks more that nothing can bring you enjoyment like after eating your favourite food, reading your favourite book, or watching your comfort show nothing brings you excitement it’s like you just feel nothing like you used to and now nothing can bring you happiness.
This blog post is very raw. I wrote this in pieces whenever I felt like my feelings needed to be poured out and now when I read this I can see that it’s better to stop caring…
And then one day with no explanation, she just didn’t care anymore.
Till we meet again, Be Happy, Be Grateful, and Keep Smiling – a girl who likes to write.
A girl who likes to write 